. (allumeuse) wrote in prettyandwitty,

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my lips are sweet and slippery like a cherub's bare red ass

i've already posted to this community, but that was as jesus, and i was neither accepted nor rejected, so i guess i'd be allowed to try as my actual self. if i'm not, then delete this or whatever.

funny things i have done:
+ pranced around the streets of mercer, pa (pop. roughly 10,000) in a tight pink girls' shirt, at 11 pm, shaking my ass and saying "HEYYYY" to every car that passed.
+ sung "underneath your clothes" in the hallway between history and english, winking randomly (last year, sophomore year)
+ popped open the back window of my mother's blazer to sing blondie and dance for the people behind us
+serenaded a group of teenage boys with cher's version of "it's in his kiss" outside of a burger king on the last day of school
+made countless conversations extremely awkward by out of nowhere saying "my father is dead" (which he is)

among other things, that depending on your definition, are either "funny" or "annoying and stupid."

the best joke ever (as told from my mom to her boyfriend):
mom: hey, you have a mattababy on your shirt.
boyfriend: a what?
mom: a mattababy.
boyfriend: what's that?
mom: a mattababy!
boyfriend: well, get it off!

clockwise from top left: me being "emo," right after i dyed my hair, my alter ego mc fag nasty, and my alter ego baghdad rose. you can read more about baghdad rose here if for some reason you cared to know.
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